Unapologetic Ranting.

Today was not a good day...at least, not until about 7:30pm.

I spent the bulk of the day absolutely hating Dallas.  This is a problem since I've committed to spend at least the next two years here.  Ironically, my day took a turn for the worse when I finally left the apartment.  The snow was rapidly melting into giant puddles; it looked like it was raining, but it was really just melted snow dripping from trees and the roof.  I had a really simple agenda: run by a mailbox to mail things that I planned to send out a week ago, pop into Michaels in search of non-lame silk roses to put in my AOII vase, and then spend the afternoon sitting in a coffee shop or bookstore reading for class.  Is that too much to ask?  I didn't think so...it wouldn't even require me to go further than a mile away from my apartment.

So I get out to my car and it's all grimy and disgusting with a palpable level of dirt caused by snow mixed with the completely ineffective sand that the Dallas Traffic Department felt would make some sort of difference (SALT, people!!  SALT!!!!).  Then, as the mailbox is located at the grocery store, getting my two envelopes in the mail box was like an Olympic triathlon, dodging cars and leaping over puddles.  Then I drove through parking lots (dodging cars all the while) to get to Michaels, and after finally finding a space a mile away, nearly fell on a sidewalk of solid ice that the shopping center had made no effort to clear.  The Michaels trip turned out to be a completely futile search anyway, so I went back to my car and as I was backing out of the space, some jerk pulls up right behind me and starts honking at me because I'm "in his way" (even though I started backing up before his majesty's arrival).  By this point, I was pretty frustrated with everything, so instead of yielding to this guys honk, I just sat there, half pulled out of the space, blocking the lane, until he figured out that if he backed up (which he had ample room to do) I would be able to pull out and we could all go on with our lives.  Then, I made efforts to go to two different places to just sit and read, but kept getting forced into the wrong lane by the ever-rude, ever-selfish, ever-dangerous Dallas drivers.  When I FINALLY made it to Half-Price Books (after almost an hour of driving on substandard road conditions in mostly pointless tasks...and never going more than 2 miles total) I went to the cafe to find a place to sit, set my eyes on the one remaining table, and then was beat to it by some fat woman and her dog.  WHY this woman had her dog in a bookstore is beyond me.  At this point, I gave up, and went back to my apartment (a 3 minute drive), and almost got hit by 4 cars at once.  Because again, people in Dallas are RUDE, SELFISH, and HORRIBLE DRIVERS.

And somewhere in the middle of all this, I decided: I hate this city.  If I wasn't bound to 2 more years of my program, I would move.  To anywhere but here.

Now the rational part of my mind acknowledges that today had certain extenuating circumstances.  First of all, I hadn't dealt with Dallas traffic in a good 4 days, so I'd had a break from remembering how ridiculous it is.  Second, almost everyone in Dallas is out driving just because they finally can get out of their houses.  Thirdly, everyone ELSE in Dallas is out trying to get their Super Bowl preparations done before tomorrow.  And finally, it is, after all, a Saturday afternoon in a heavily populated semi-suburban area of a major city.  What can you expect, really?

I've always classified myself as a city person.  My tastes run more to the museum and concert hall variety than outdoor adventures, and this leads me to prefer the city to the countryside.  After today though, I think I need to add a caveat: I am a SMALL city person.  I am a Lexington-size city person: it has things to do, it's walkable, and you won't have 20 near-accidents every time you get in your car.  The only way I can be a city person is if it has a good subway system, like Paris or Montreal or Washington DC.  If I can walk in a city, that's fine.  If I have to drive in it...forget about it.

Lately, several people have asked me what my post-Masters plans are.  At the moment, it's a completely blank slate...I think about the future, and I just see black in my mind, like the film reel of a movie suddenly cut out.  But I'll tell you this: as far as I can help it, my future will NOT include Dallas.  Even if I meet the love of my life here, we're moving.  Too bad for him.

Dallas has two years to get me to fall in love with it.  It better start trying harder; because right now, it's not doing a good job of winning me over.

A quick note of positivity: the day DID look up when my friend Miranda invited me out to see a movie with her.  We chose "The King's Speech."  It was EXCELLENT.  Absolutely excellent.  It's one of those movies that isn't just artfully done, but unfailingly intelligent - even in its humor.  Moreover, its deep character study is enough to touch the heart of anyone who has ever doubted themselves, or ever worried that they weren't good enough.  It's truly magnificent.  And it has Colin Firth, Helena Bonham-Carter, and Geoffrey Rush; you really can't go wrong with them.  I mean it - go see this movie.  Like, right now.

So that brightened up my day a bit.  The unfortunate thing is that my anger at the world kept me from doing any homework at all.  It's looking doubtful that I'll finish my Education reading by Tuesday...I might end up just skimming the chapters enough to answer the reflection questions that my teacher sent out.  I also have a Blackboard Post to do for my church history class, and a New Testament paper due Thursday...not to mention that I haven't touched my Prayer and Spirituality reading, which is for my Monday class.  After church tomorrow, I'm planning to hit the books for an all-homework day.  I may go out to a coffee shop during the Super Bowl...I imagine that those parts of Dallas might be a bit less crowded during that time.

Besides, football is lame.  Just like Dallas.