Looking Forward

Today was the first day of school at my alma mater.  I wouldn't have known this if not for the conglomeration of "happy-first-day-back"/"I-miss-Transy!" statuses that popped up all over my Facebook this morning.

It was at this point that I discovered a startling truth:  I don't miss Transylvania.

This is not to say that I don't have positive memories of my undergraduate years, or that I don't still want to maintain friendships from those years.  I just don't sit around actively pining for the past.  And THAT is something that is very, very different from last year.

Last year, I was acutely aware of all the goings-on at Transylvania that I was missing.  For example, I remember one evening last September when I realized that I was putting groceries in my car while the majority of my friends were starting the first night of sorority recruitment, and subsequently felt sad, like I was missing out on something.  Of course, in retrospect, this is silly - I hadn't missed out on anything from college (except that perhaps I made more responsible decisions than the stereotypical college student).  I had my four years, and I moved on, like everyone is meant to do.  But for my entire first year out of college, I missed those years with a passion - it felt like something had been taken from me.

Which is why not missing Transy was an intriguing realization this morning, and why seeing Facebook posts of other people missing Transy was odd...because no one missed Transy more than me last year.

It's probably no coincidence that my not-missing-college epiphany coincided with the equally surprising realization that I love my life here in Dallas.

Yes, I get stressed out with homework.  Yes, there are times I want to crawl under the library table and hide. Yes, there are times when it's hot and there are lizards and I wish that Texas was a bit less Texan.  Yes, there are times that the traffic makes my goody-two-shoes self want to swear like a sailor.  But overall...I love my life here.  It took me a full year, but I'm finally beginning to feel the connection to my life here that I once felt to my life in Lexington.

I feel like I belong here.

Even better, I feel like I'm at a point where I look forward more than I look back.  And that is a very good feeling.